Reversed Loses, Settled Lawsuits, Pickled Gold and 20 Crypto Jokes

Let’s see what this past week served on our crypto table. Bitcoin and major altcoins reversed losses Monday, after the Fed announced unprecedented measures to support the economy, while Coronavirus put gold in a peculiar pickle. As BTC mining difficulty saw a historic drop, a new Cardano scaling solution was unveiled but ADA remained unchanged. BitMEX said that their BTC 35K Insurance Fund fulfilled its role during the market crash, and Coinbase said it’ll allow its app users direct access to crypto lending platforms. Meanwhile, ZenGo warned of a dapp and wallet security issue, offering a solution, the Hive blockchain launched, while HIVE coin was listed just a day after, and the Tezos Foundation settled a lawsuit outside of court.

Stress-tested crypto companies focused on new products and growth, we looked into whether Bitcoin is becoming an alternative for Wall Street investors, while Monex Group is set to become the first major securities firm to give out end-of-year BTC benefits. Meanwhile, U.S. digital dollar proposal appeared in three draft bills by the Democrats, Russia may legalize cryptocurrencies for companies and investors operating in regulatory sandboxes, China may ramp up digital currency progress to ‘fend off risk’ from the U.S., and South Korea may fight COVID-19’s economic fallout with stablecoin handouts. Also, South Korean crypto exchanges were cooperating with the police investigation into the Telegram “Nth room” sexual exploitation case. Speaking of Telegram, it lost the latest legal round against SEC, while Kik’s just starting another round. And while Bitcoin miners are waiting to hit a breakeven point, Tezos, Consensys, and others shared their COVID-19 stories.

You ask, we deliver – the jokes.
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And the week hath begun. And repeat. And the week…

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The stimulus that stimulated a severe slew of simultaneously stimulating jokes.

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A very efficient solution.

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And if there’s still somebody who doesn’t know what’s happening, this sums it up.

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#FlattentheCurve

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Oh, that’s nice. He just got himself a trillion dollars. And you can get one too.

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Fedoprah style.

$6,000,000,000,000. from r/Bitcoin

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Meanwhile, Bitcoin was on an adventure.

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Crypto trader vs. stock trader.

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So the same as pre-Covid-induced social distancing…

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Traders’ life suggestion.

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Traders’ breakfast suggestion.

I Still Didn’t Eat My Breakfast. I HODL! from r/Bitcoin

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Trading rules are the same as tattoo rules – don’t make decisions when you’re drunk.

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Be like Papa.

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Ah, close enough, let’s do it…

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Like that time few days ago it hit USD 4K level…. Just saying.

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Plausible, like that documentary with that dude who wanted to terminate that kid, what’s it called again…

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You’ll tell your grandkids of the Great 2020 White Paper Shortage. And they’ll be like: “OK, Millennial.”

2020 Whitepaper from u/yogiwaan

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Imagine issuing a stablecoin pegged to a standard, 227 g / 8 oz roll of toilet paper.

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And here’s your anthem for this week.